This Is What Japan’s Penis Festival Looks Like & We Bet The World Has Never Seen So Many Penises In A Lifetime

April is an important month throughout the world. There’s Fool’s Day when all of us try our best to play pranks on each other that NEVER work and, of course, the appraisals by the end of which your boss awards you with two more peanuts. Japan, however, has its own way of celebrating April. No flowers, no fireworks, no idols. GIANT PINK PENISES is how Japan does it.


The first Sunday of April every year is a special, special day in Japan. People parade carrying these monster penises on their shoulders, and suck on phallic-shaped lollipops. It’s called the Kanamara Matsuri. It was first started in 1977 and has continued till date because, that’s how much the Japanese love penises.


We found out the legend behind this festival and it’s so bizarre, we can’t even….


So, legend has it that there once lived a sharp toothed demon who took shelter in a woman’s vagina, because that’s what demons do, apparently. The demon loved sausages so it castrated the men she tried having sex with. The lady thought of seeking help. Not from a gynaecologist or any other doctor, but a blacksmith, because… Japan. The blacksmith made her a customized iron phallus (yes, dildo) to break the demon’s teeth. All was well again – the lady had her share of fun and the demon died too. That iron phallus (yup, that dildo) was enshrined.

No matter how bizarre the world gets, Japan always beats everyone to it.

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